Hey Queen,
Read this when you’re feeling alone as you grow into new versions of yourself, or when you need some inspiration to keep pursuing the adventurous life of prosperity you know you’re meant for.
I stood in line by myself at the sunglass buffet, listening to the girl behind me yap about how many times she’s been to Paris.
Surrounded by women in colorful sundresses with giant rings and perfectly highlighted hair, I internally scorned at the tight butthole energy around me while voices in my head chanted You should just be grateful to be here.
So instead of mingling at this event put on specifically for +1 guests, I kept to myself. Warding off the judgment around this new reality:
Spain. Hawaii. France. Italy. Thailand. All in one year.
Traveling and living freely the way I’ve always wanted — with my best friend (and personal body guard) by my side, a business thriving at home without my presence, and the perfect harmony of scrappy adventure and comfort.
And now as a cherry on top… free Versace sunglasses?
I say this with genuine perplex — Since when is this my life?? How did I get here?
Now would be the quintessential time to say something like…
“I had everything I wanted, and I still felt empty.”
But I’ve learned that joy and gratitude is always a choice — whether you’re at a mountain top or the lowest low of a valley. (Throwback to Portugal, 2023 — full story in Fun Because 📖😉)
So while that narrative isn’t true for me anymore, what is true is that there’s still a lot of imposter syndrome, confusion and guilt that tries to sneak in at every lookout point.
It all tries to distract me from this beautiful view and prolong the discomfort I felt during the climb up.
Tries to convince me that it’s still not safe to rest, relax and enjoy.
Here’s how guilt, confusion and imposter syndrome have been showing up for me and how I’m shifting the narrative:
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I can’t help but notice that it’s all smoke and mirrors — everything that looks grandiose and dreamy has a story concealed behind the curtain that the crowd was never meant to see.
Example: seeing my NYC billboard ad appear on the same screen that any Jo shmo can rent and broadcast awkward family photos covered with the words “Welcome, Ramirez family!”
It was so hard not to let myself be robbed of joy in the moment the screen went from this…
To this:
What’s true for me now is every time I reach a new height and things look better than ever on paper, panic rushes in and the fear of falling off the edge is a full body sensation I must manage quickly.
What’s true for me is that it’s still hard to embrace being a team with Alex because I don’t feel worthy unless I earn something completely independently.
I grew up in a culture of minimum wage and tight budgets, and regardless of how much has changed I’m not sure I’ll ever feel like it’s enough or that I belong in rooms of affluence.
And although I know belonging is a choice, most days I still feel like I don’t belong anywhere.
What’s true is that I feel incredibly weird and lame sharing this right now.
Because I used to be able to be an open book on social media, and lately there are new invisible lines and rules to follow to maintain humility and like-ability.
I don’t really know how to play that game yet, so I guess this is me experimenting with how to speak on a new, more ideal reality without coming off as out of touch or cynical.
There’s a lot of uncertainty lately, but what I know for sure is that there’s a duality of joy and new challenges at every level. And I think it’s really important to shine light on all of it instead of pretending it’s a one-sided endeavor.
It’s not all rainbows and butterflies and ease and flow.
And it’s not all blood sweat and tears.
It’s not wrong to thrive in a world where there’s a lot of suffering.
And it’s not wrong to recognize your privilege and still allow yourself joy.
So while I’m in line for our next flight with my new sunglasses and “unhinged for cheeseburgers” tank top — I’m just learning how to remain myself and enjoy the duality without apologizing for it.
And I hope that you, a purpose driven woman with big dreams and desires, never feel guilty about your rising.
There will always be duality, a spectrum where people either accept where they were placed upon birth, or work to adjust their placement.
There will always be people struggling and there will always be people thriving.
It doesn’t make you wrong or out of touch to tap into prosperity and thrive.
It simply equips you to be the one to help meet others’ needs and lead them into prosperity — which everyone wants, but few know how to achieve.
Be one of those people who cracks the code and shares it.
Because you’ll have a secret sauce and there’s an entire subgroup of people who need your sauce.
My secret sauce is leveraging the energy and mindset of fun and joy.
That’s not the only ingredient in the recipe of prosperity, but it was the missing piece for me, and I know I’m not the only one.
I know that by adding this one ingredient, many hard working, intelligent people will unlock the door to parts of life they’ve always wanted.
Which makes me wonder — what secret sauce magic key will YOU share with the world?
Continuing to rise into your dreams and desires is the only way to find out ✨ Keep going, queen. And as always…
Enjoy.
Xo
Kari
PS – if you’re trying to accelerate your growth and it feels heavy, confusing or overwhelming – entrepreneurship coaching or a small group mastermind may be a great fit. Click here, apply and we’ll explore the options together ✨